BuildBotsBetterThe Battle of the Labyrinth by Rick Riordan, narrated by Ty Farnsworth. Chapter 1. I Battle the Cheerleading Squad. The last thing I wanted to do on my summer break was blow up another school. But there I was Monday morning, the first week of June, sitting in my mom's car in front of Good High School on East 81st. Good was this big brownstone building overlooking the East River. A bunch of BMWs and Lincoln town cars were parked out front. Staring up at the fancy stone archway, I wondered how long it would take me to get kicked out of this place.
Just relax. My mom didn't sound relaxed. It's only an orientation tour. And remember, dear, this is Paul's school. So try not to, you know, destroy it? Yes. Paul Blofus, my mom's boyfriend, was standing out front, greeting future ninth graders as they came up the steps. With his salt and pepper hair, denim clothes, and leather jacket, he reminded me of a TV actor, but he was just an English teacher. He'd managed to convince Good High School to accept me for ninth grade, despite the fact that I'd gotten kicked out of every school I'd ever attended.
I tried to warn him it wasn't a good idea, but he wouldn't listen. I looked at my mom. You haven't told him the truth about me, have you? She tapped her fingers nervously on the wheel. She was dressed up for a job interview, her best blue dress, and high-heeled shoes. I thought we should wait. She admitted. So we don't scare him away? I'm sure orientation will be fine, Percy. It's only one morning. Great. I mumbled. I can get expelled before I even start the school year. I think positive. Tomorrow you're off to camp. After orientation you've got your date.
It's not a date. I protested it. It's just Annabeth Mom. Jeez. She's coming all the way from camp to meet you. Well, yeah. You're going to the movies. Yeah. Just the two of you. Mom! She held up her hand and surrendered, but I could tell she was trying hard not to smile. You better get inside, dear. I'll see you tonight. I was about to get out of the car when I looked over at the steps of the school. Paul Blofus was greeting a girl with frizzy red hair. Jora marooned t-shirt and ratty jeans decorated with marker drawings. When she turned I cut a glimpse of her face and the hairs on my arms stood straight up.
Percy, my mom asked, what's wrong? Nothing, I stammered. Does the school have a side entrance? Down the block on the right. Why? I'll see you later. My mom started to say something, but I got out of the car and ran, hoping the redheaded girl wouldn't see me. What was she doing here? Not even my luck could be this bad. Yeah, right. I was about to find out my luck could get a whole lot worse. Sneaking into orientation didn't work out too well. Two cheerleaders in purple and white uniforms were standing at the side entrance, waiting to ambush freshmen.
Hi! They smiled, which I figured was the first and last time any cheerleaders would be that friendly to me. One was blonde with icy blue eyes, the other was African American with dark curly hair like Medusa's, and believe me, I know what I'm talking about. Both girls had their names stitched in cursive on their uniforms, but with my dyslexia, the words looked like meaningless spaghetti. Welcome to good, the blonde girl said. You are so going to love it. But as she looked me up and down, her expression said something more like, ew, who is this loser?
The other girl stepped uncomfortably close to me. I studied the stitching on her uniform and made out kelly. She smelled like roses and something else I recognized for writing lessons at camp. The scent of freshly washed horses. The weird smell for a cheerleader. Maybe she owned a horse or something. Anyway, she stood so close I got the feeling she was going to try and push me down the steps. What's your name, fish? Fish. Freshman. Uh, Percy. The girls exchanged looks. Oh, Percy Jackson! The blonde one said, we've been waiting for you. That sent a major uh oh chill down my back.
They were blocking the entrance, smiling in a not very friendly way. My hand kept creeping instinctively toward my pocket where I kept my lethal ballpoint pen rip-tied. Then another voice came from inside the building. Percy. It was Paul Blofas, somewhere down the hallway. I'd never been so glad to hear his voice. The cheerleaders backed off. I was so anxious to get past them I accidentally need kelly in a thigh. Clang. Her leg made a hollow metallic sound like I just hit a flagpole. Ow! She muttered. What a tit fish! I glanced down but her leg looked like a regular old leg.
I was too freaked out to ask questions. I dashed into the hall. The cheerleaders laughing behind me. There you are, Paul told me. Welcome to good. Hey Paul, um uh Mr. Blofas. I glanced back but the weird cheerleaders had disappeared. Percy, you look like you've seen a ghost. Yeah uh Paul clapped me on the back. Listen, I know you're nervous but don't worry. We get a lot of kids here with ADHD and dyslexia. The teachers know how to help. I almost wanted to laugh. If only ADHD and dyslexia were my biggest worries. I mean I knew Paul was trying to help but if I told them the truth about me he'd either think I was crazy or he'd run away screaming.
Those cheerleaders for instance had a bad feeling about them. Then I looked down the hall and I remembered I had another problem. The red-headed girl I'd seen out the front steps was coming in the main entrance. Don't notice me. I prayed. She noticed me. Her eyes widened. Where's the orientation? I asked Paul. The gym? That way but by Percy? He called but I was already running. I thought I'd lost her. A bunch of kids were heading for the gym and soon I was just one of three hundred hundred fourteen-year-olds all crammed into the bleachers. A marching band played an out of tune fight song that sounded like somebody hitting a bag of cats with a metal baseball bat.
Older kids, probably student council members, stood up front modeling the good school uniform and looking, hey we're cool. Teachers milled around smiling and shaking hands with students. The walls of the gym were plastered with big purple and white banners that said, welcome future freshmen. Good is good. We're all family. And a bunch of other happy slogans that pretty much made me want to throw up. None of the other freshmen looked thrilled to be here. I mean coming to orientation in June when school doesn't even start till September is not cool.
But at good, we prepare to excel early. At least that's what the bros sure had said. The marching band stopped playing. A guy in a pinstripe suit came to the microphone and started talking. But the sound echoed around the gym so I had no idea what he was saying. He might have been gargling. Someone grabbed my shoulder. What are you doing here? It was her, my redheaded nightmare. Rachel Elizabeth there. I said, her jaw dropped like she couldn't believe I had the nerve to remember her name. And your Percy somebody didn't get your full last name last December when you tried to kill me.
Look, I wasn't, I didn't. What are you doing here? Same as you I guess. Orientation. You live in New York. What? You thought I lived at Hoover Dam? It had never occurred to me. Whenever I thought about her and I'm not saying I thought about her. She just crossed my mind from time to time. Okay? I've been there since she lived in the Hoover Dam area since that's where I'd met her. We spent maybe ten minutes together during which time I'd accidentally swung a sword at her. She'd saved my life and I'd run away chased by a band of supernatural killing machines.
You know, your typical chance meeting. Some guy behind us whispered, hey shut up. The cheerleaders are talking. Hi guys. A girl bubbled into the microphone. It was the blonde I'd seen at the entrance. My name is Tammy and this is like Kelly. Kelly did a cartwheel. It took me Rachel Yalt like someone had stuck her with a pin. A few kids looked over and snickered but Rachel just stared at the cheerleaders and horror. Tammy didn't seem to notice the outburst. She started talking about all the great ways we could get involved during our freshman year.
Run. Rachel told me. Now. Why? Rachel didn't explain. She pushed her way to the edge of the bleachers, ignoring the frowning teachers and grumbling kids she was stepping on. I hesitated. Tammy was explaining how we were about to break into small groups and tour the school. Kelly caught my eye and gave me an amused smile like she was waiting to see what I'd do. It would look bad if I left right now. Paul Blofas was down there with the rest of the teachers. He'd wonder what was wrong. Then I thought about Rachel Elizabeth there and the special ability she'd shown last winter at Hoover Dam.
She'd been able to see a group of security guards who weren't guards at all. It weren't even human. My heart pounding I got up and followed her out of the gym. I found Rachel in the band room. She was hiding behind a bass drum in the percussion section. Get over here. She said. Keep your head down. I felt pretty silly hiding behind a bunch of bongos but I crouched beside her. Did they follow you? Rachel asked. You mean the cheerleaders? She nodded nervously. I don't think so. I said. What are they? What do you see? Her green eyes were bright with fear.
She had a sprinkle of freckles on her face that reminded me of constellations. Her maroon t-shirt read, Harvard Art Department. You wouldn't believe me. Oh yeah I would. I promised. I know you can see through the mist. The what? The mist? It's well, it's like this veil that hides the way things really are. Some mortals are born with the ability to see right through it. Like you. She studied me carefully. You did that at Hoover Dam. You called me a mortal. Like you're not. I felt like punching a bongo. What was I thinking? I could never explain.
I shouldn't even try. Tell me. She begged. You know what it means. All these horrible things I see. Look, this is going to sound weird. Do you know anything about Greek myths? Like the Minotaur and the Hydra? Yeah, just try not to say those names when I'm around, okay? And the Furies, she said warming up. And the sirens and okay. I looked around at the band hall, sure that Rachel was going to make a bunch of blood thirsty nasties pop out of the walls, but we were still alone. Down the hallway I heard a mob of kids coming out of the gymnasium. They were starting the group tours.
We didn't have long to talk. All these monsters, I said. All the Greek gods. They're real. I knew it. I would have been more comfortable if she'd call me a liar, but Rachel looked like I just confirmed her worst suspicion. You don't know how hard it's been, she said. For years I thought I was going crazy. I couldn't tell anybody. I couldn't. Her eyes narrowed. Wait, who are you? I mean, really. I'm not a monster. Well, I know that. I could see if you were. You look like you, but you're not human, are you? I swallowed. Even though I'd had three years to get used to who I was, I'd never talked about it with a regular mortal before.
I mean, except for my mom, but she already knew. I don't know why, but I took the plunge. I'm a half blood, I said. I'm half human. And half what? Just then Tammy and Kelly stepped into the band room. The doors slammed shut behind them. There you are, Percy Jackson. Tammy said. It's time for your orientation. They're horrible, Rachel gasped. Tammy and Kelly were still wearing their purple and white cheerleader costumes, holding pom-poms from the rally. What did they really look like? I asked, but Rachel seemed too stunned to answer. Oh, forget her.
Tammy gave me a brilliant smile and started walking toward us. Kelly stayed by the doors blocking her exit. They trapped us. I knew we'd have to fight our way out, but Tammy's smile was so dazzling it distracted me. Her blue eyes were beautiful, and though her hair swept over her shoulders. Percy! Rachel warned. I said something really intelligent like, uh. Tammy was getting closer. She held out her pom-poms. Percy! Rachel's voice seemed to be coming from a long way away. Snap out of it! It took all my willpower, but I got my pen out of my pocket and uncapped it.
Rip tide grew into a three-foot-long bronze sword. It's blade glowing with faint golden light. Tammy smiled turned to a sneer. Oh, come on! She protested. You don't need that. How would it kiss instead? She smelled like roses and clean animal for a weird but somehow intoxicating smell. She'll pinch my arm hard. Percy! She wants to bite you! Look at her! She's just jealous. Tammy looked back at Kelly. May I mistress? Kelly was still blocking the door, licking her lips hungrily. Go ahead, Tammy. You're doing fine. Tammy took another step forward, but I leveled the tip of my sword at her chest.
Get back. She snarled. Freshman, she said, with disgust. This is our school half blood. We feed on whom we choose. Then she began to change. The color drained out of her face and arms. Her skin turned white as chalk. Her eyes completely red. Her teeth grew into fangs. A vampire! I stammered. Then I noticed her legs. Below the cheerleader skirt, her left leg was brown and shaggy with a donkey's hoof. Her right leg was shaped like a human leg, but it was made of bronze. A vampire with... Don't mention the legs! Tammy snapped. It's ruined to make fun.
She advanced on her weird mismatch legs. She looked totally bizarre, especially with the pom-poms, but I couldn't laugh, not facing those red eyes and sharp fangs. A vampire, you say, Kelly laughed. That silly legend was based on Aussie fool. We are in Pusay. Servants of a he-kate. Mmm. Tammy edged close to me. Dark magic formed us from animal, bronze, and ghost. We exist to feed on the blood of young men. Now, come. Give me that kiss. She buried her fangs. I was so paralyzed I couldn't move, but Rachel threw a snare drum at the empus' head. The demon hissed and battered the drum away.
It went rolling along the aisles between music stands. It springs rattling against the drum head. Rachel threw a xylophone, but the demon just swatted that away too. I don't usually kill girls. Tammy growled. But for you, mortal, I'll make an exception. Your eyesight is a little too good. She lunged at Rachel. No! I slashed with riptide. Tammy tried to dodge my blade, but it sliced right through her cheerleader uniform. And with a horrible wail, she exploded into dust all over Rachel. Rachel coughed. She looked like she just had a sack of flour dunked on her head.
Gross! Monsters do that. I said, sorry. You killed my trainee. Kelly yelled. You need a lesson in school spirit, half blood. Then she too began to change. Her wiry hair turned into flickering flames. Her eyes turned red. She grew fangs. She loped toward us, her brass foot and hoof clapping unevenly on the band room floor. I am senior impusa, she growled. No hero has bested me in a thousand years. Yeah? I said, then you're overdue. Kelly was a lot faster than Tammy. She dodged my first strike and rolled into the brass section, knocking over a row of trombones with a mighty crash.
Rachel scrambled out of the way. I put myself between her and the impusa. Kelly circled us, her eyes going from me to the sword. Such a pretty little blade, she said. What a shame it stands between us. Her form shimmered, sometimes a demon, sometimes a pretty cheerleader. I tried to keep my mind focused, but it was really distracting. Poor dear Kelly chuckled. You don't even know what's happening, do you? Soon you're pretty little camp in flames, your friends made slaves to the Lord of Time, and there's nothing you can do to stop it. I would be merciful to end your life now before you have to see that.
From down the hall I heard voices. A tour group was approaching. A man was saying something about locker combinations. The impusa's eyes lit up. Excellent. We're about to have company. She picked up a tube in through it at me. Rachel I ducked. The tube has sailed over our heads and crashed through the window. The voices in the hall died down. Per se, Kelly shouted, pretending to be scared. Why did you throw that? I was too surprised to answer. Kelly picked up a music stand and swiped a row of clarinets and flutes. Chairs and musical instruments crashed to the floor.
Stop it, I said. People were tromping down the hall now, coming in our direction. Time to greet our visitors. Kelly bared her fangs and ran for the doors. I charged after her with riptide. I had to stop her from hurting the mortals. Per se, don't. Rachel shouted. But I hadn't realized what Kelly was up to until it was too late. Kelly flung open the doors. Paul Blofus and a bunch of freshmen stepped back in shock. I raised my sword. At the last second the impusa turned toward me like a cowering victim. Oh no. Please. She cried. I couldn't stop my blade.
It was already in motion. Just before the celestial bronze hitter, Kelly exploded into flames like a Molotov cocktail. Waves of fire splashed over everything. I'd never seen a monster do that before. But I didn't have time to wonder about it. I backed into the band room as flames engulfed the doorway. Per se, Paul Blofus looked completely stunned, staring at me from across the fire. What have you done? Kids screamed and ran down the hall. The fire alarm wailed, sealing sprinklers hissed to life. In the chaos Rachel tugged on my sleeve. You have to get out of here.
She was right. The school was in flames and I'd be held responsible. Mortals couldn't see through the mist properly. To them it would look like I'd just attacked a helpless cheerleader in front of a group of witnesses. There was no way I could explain it. I turned from Paul and sprinted for the broken band room window. I burst out of the alley onto East 81st and ran straight into Anabeth. Hey, you're out early. She laughed, grabbing my shoulders to keep me from tumbling into the street. Watch where you're going seaweed brain. For a split second she was in a good mood and everything was fine.
She was wearing jeans and an orange camp shirt and her clay bead necklace. Her blonde hair was pulled back in a ponytail. Her gray eyes sparkled. She looked like she was ready to catch a movie, have a cool afternoon hanging out together. But then Rachel Elizabeth there still covered in monster dust, came charging out of the alley. Yelling, Percy, wait up. Anabeth smiled melted. She stared at Rachel, then to the school. For the first time she seemed to notice the black smoke in the ringing fire alarms. She frowned at me. What did you do this time?
Who's this? Oh, Rachel, Anabeth, Rachel. She's a friend, I guess. I wasn't sure what else to call Rachel. I mean, I barely knew her, but after being in two life or death situations together I couldn't just call her nobody. Hi, Rachel said. Then she turned to me. You are in so much trouble and you're still only an explanation. Police sirens wailed on FDR drive. Percy, Anabeth said coldly. We should go. I want to know more about half bloods. Rachel insisted. And monsters and the stuff about the gods. She grabbed my arm, whipped out a permanent marker and wrote a phone number on my hand.
You're going to call me and explain. Okay, you owe me that. Now, keep going. But I'll make up some story. Rachel said. I'll tell him it wasn't your fault. Just go. She ran back toward the school leaving Anabeth and me in the street. Anabeth stared at me for a second then she turned and took off. Hey. I jogged after her. There were these two impusae. I tried to explain. They were cheerleaders. And they said the camp was going to burn and you told a mortal girl about half bloods. She can see through the mist. She saw the monsters before I did. So you told her the truth.
She recognized me from Hoover Dam. So you've met her before. Last winter. But seriously, I barely know her. She's kind of cute. I never thought about it. Anabeth kept walking toward York Avenue. I'll deal with this school. I promised Anakchus to change this subject. Well, honest. It'll be fine. Anabeth wouldn't even look at me. I guess our afternoon is off. We should get you out of here now that the police will be searching for you. Behind us smoke billowed up from good high school. In the dark column of ashes I thought I could almost see a face.
A sheedie man with red eyes laughing at me. Your pretty little camp in flames, Kelly had said. Your friends made slaves to the Lord of Time. You're right. I told Anabeth. My heart's sinking. We have to get to camp half blood. No.